i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
