last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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