youre lurking in front of me
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
I wasn't going to drink tonight, but was reminded this is the anniversary of prohibition being repealed. If I don't, then I am against my profession of bartending and anti-American, right?
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
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