Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
