Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
