he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
