At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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