It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
