you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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