you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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