He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
