For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
