he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
don't judge my taste in strippers
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