never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
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