We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
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I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
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That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.