Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
These 19 Underage Drinkers Epicly Got By With A Horrible Fake ID
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
These Are The 21 Strangest Sexual Fantasy Confessions
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH