Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
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