who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
