I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots