Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.