So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.