its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
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