He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
