that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
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