awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize