eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Randomize
