so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I'm too high and old for this...
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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