he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious