yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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