my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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