I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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