I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
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