She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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