Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I'm hungover in the park, and some guy just handed me a business card for his church. I can feel Jesus' disapproval running through my fingertips
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
