another moral hangover. fuck.
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Randomize
