margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Randomize
