the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
It's never too late to be topless.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
Randomize