i just woke up in a strange room and the first thing i saw was a chewbacca mask... wtf
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Randomize