This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
as a side note pls kill me
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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