I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
