I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
We left the knife in your bed.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
