Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Randomize
