did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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