i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
