This dress was meant to end up on your floor
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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