im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
