white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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