You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
