Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
