Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
