on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
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