We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
