U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
70 feet underwater and I sharted my wetsuit, Tide pen won't clean this up.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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