Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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